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Episode 106: Distracted by Your Phone? 2 Key Steps for Christian Women to Overcome Digital Distraction

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Hey friend- still love me after that tough love on Episode 105  about how much you’re on your phone?  Good, cuz if we’re gonna hang out and talk about Time Management and How to Make the Best Use of it…we gotta call out the Elephant in the room- that digital device that is ALWAYS attached to you like another appendage. Girl, whether you’re average, or above it or below it, AWARENESS is the first key step for Christian Women to Overcome Digital Distraction and have better time management…especially in light of eternity.

So do you know where your SCREEN TIME is at right now?  

Seriously, push pause and go check your screen time number. And then record it on the REDEEM Her Phone-Time Challenge Guide (you can access inside our community) where we’re supporting each other on this challenge, me included cuz this is something we all need to keep track of, right?).  Remember, no shame, no story, no need to justify your number…pretend like you’re a reporter just collecting the facts.  

You gotta know where you are to determine where you wanna go.  

Here’s a statistic I ran across in the book we’re staring in the community Book Club,  The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry by John Mark Comer, that might blow your mind (but before I share…let me give a shameless plug for the REDEEM Her Time Community…this would be the perfect time to come join us for the REDEEM Her Phone-Time Challenge AND read this book with us…in fact this book was that catalyst that shifted so many things in my life around time and busyness. And it was my dad who sent it to me and said, “I hope I didn’t offend you.”  Nothing but gratitude for you Dad cuz you saw something in my life I couldn’t see myself)…now what was I gonna share?  Oh yeah, that mind-blowing stat…you ready for this???

The average iPhone user touches (his or) her phone 2,617 times a day.

THAT’S CRAZY…and that’s just phones- that doesn’t include tablets or smart tvs that give full access to the internet, apps and Netflix. And what’s scary is that according to surveys, most people have no clue how much time is lost to their phone. That’s why AWARENESS is the first step. Cuz you can’t change what you don’t know.  

Interestingly, studies have also found that “just being in the same room as your phone (even if it’s turned off) will reduce your working memory and problem solving skills. That’s power over you as your magic device “silently shouts at your brain at all times.”

As John Mark Comer concludes, the translation of these findings are that our “smart phones make us DUMBER”.  (Stay tuned…cuz we’re gonna tackle how to make your SMART PHONE dumber in an upcoming episode in the REDEEM Her Phone-Time Series)

And we don’t have to look too far to see the effects on our health, relationships and time.

Remember when the school bell rang for the last time on that long-awaited day in June and you ran home from the bus stop to enjoy your first day of Summer Vacation?  What did you do first?  Back in the day, I remember heading to the library for a stack of good books, biking to the park with friends, or begging my mom to take me to the craft store for supplies for my next project.  Now let me ask you, what do your kids (or yourself) run to first today?  Most likely it’s reaching for their (aka your) phones or devices, right? And then all summer it’s a constant battle to pull them (or yourself) away from those screens and out into the fresh air to enjoy creation, be active and make memories together.  I’m thankful my kids grew up before cell phones had trickled down to the ages where they start now.  But they did have a Wii that we had to set time limits on (you know what- I was watching my friend’s kids the other day and they told me that gaming system was from the dinosaur age! Fine with me cuz that way there’s not always something new to draw you in).

I can’t put the blame on my kids, without turning the focus on myself. 

I hate to admit, I’ve spent way too many family movie nights and road trips on my laptop or phone and missed the sights, the funny moments, the time to connect. All in the name of “just one more thing”…one more thing that really didn’t matter.  Can you relate?  

I was just talking with a friend today who told me that she’s seeing the impact of phones seep into her family- sure, they may all be in the same room, but unless her kids, hubby and herself are forced to leave phones at the door, they’re all in their own worlds on their digital devices. It never used to be that anything competed with family dinner or those long-awaited weekly tv shows you all watched together cuz there was only one screen.  Now “put down your phone” seems to come up in conversation way too often…or even worse goes unsaid while time is wasted. 

Not only does our phone time affect our relationships, but more and more information is coming out about how it affects our health, our movement (or lack thereof), our sleep, our stress, our outlook on life, our mental wellness…depression and suicide is at an all-time high and I don’t think it’s a cooincidence that phone usage is also the most it’s ever been.  

And for what?  

Well…for manufacturers and marketers for sure. Everything about our phones is being designed for distraction and addiction…cuz that’s where the money is. 

And even in light of eternity, for the enemy whose entire existence is to draw people away from God. So we gotta ask, what effect does our phone-time have on our spirit?

Cuz you become what you set your mind on.  

Romans 8:5-6 tells us, “For those who live according to flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit.  For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.”

So let me ask- when you’re on your phone, what is your mind being set on? 

You know what keeps coming to mind as I think about digital distraction? The book Screwtape Letters by CS Lewis- have you read it? This classic satire is a series of letters in which Screwtape, an experienced demon, instructs his young apprentice, Wormwood, on strategies for tempting the human being assigned to him.

And do you know what one of his key strategies is?  DISTRACTION.  

Screwtape teaches Wormwood that an effective method to tempt someone who is already welcoming distractions is to keep him (or her) from having to think about his current state and what he ought to be doing. His advice to Wormwood is that he can easily waste a person’s life through seemingly little worthless distractions.  Listen to what he says…

“But do remember, the only thing that matters is the extent to which you separate the man from the Enemy [in his eyes, that’s God]. It does not matter how small the sins are provided that their cumulative effect is to edge the man away from the Light and out into the Nothing.”

AWAY from the Light and OUT into the NOTHING.

Does that hit you a little too close to home too?  And that was written in 1942- long before we had digital distractions in our hands all day long!  Each scroll, each swipe, each click, each like, each search…it all adds up. And as believers we must ask…is it cumulatively taking us towards God…or away from Him? Sadly, probably the latter.

His tactics have not changed…we just keep giving him more opportunity by opening ourselves up to distraction with our phone.  

Please hear me on this- This is not to guilt you into not opening your phone or shame you for using it or even convincing you it is evil and of the devil.  You will see as we go through this REDEEM Her Phone-Time Challenge that we can do just that- REDEEM it (aka make the best use of it).  We can actually use our phones to love God and glorify Him MORE…and to love others MORE as well. But first we have to get honest about how the distraction affects us- inside and out, body and spirit.

Because what has influence over us, can easily become an idol.

Here comes another hard question…Has your phone become an idol?  I can’t answer that for you, only for myself and it will look different for everyone. But one easy way to test that is to ask, how much time do you spend in the word vs on a screen?  Ugh.  I’ve had to wrestle with that question myself. Because for far too long, my quiet time was a check the box first thing in my day and then the rest of it was spent seeking my value from other people, most of whom were behind a screen. How many likes did I get or comments on my post? What was the latest thing she shared?  What was the pinterest way to plan my day or organize my home?  Nothing necessarily evil in itself, but together it led to comparison and feeling that I’m not enough and not doing enough and took me to the world’s solutions to my emptiness and need for value…all the while God’s truth sat waiting for me.  

The Bible doesn’t use the word screens, but it does talk about where to focus so we don’t get distracted. 

We’ve been going verse by verse through 1 Thessalonians at church lately and recently we read chapter 4 verse 11 which says, “….aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs and to work with your hands…”  And our pastor pointed out how these instructions from Paul to the Thessalonians in their day in age could also apply to us living in this modern digital age.  My antenna went up as I thought about you (and me) and how to redeem our time for Him. Do you see it?  

Our devices tell us to live out loud, to draw attention to ourselves.

Paul tells us to live quietly.

Our devices say to know all-the-things about everyone else’s lives.

Paul says to mind your own affairs.

Our devices lead us to laziness and neglecting our work.

Paul leads us away from being idle to working with our hands. 

Paul even goes on to exhort these same people in 2 Thessalonians 3:11, to not become busy bodies- which is naturally what happens when we spend a good part of our day in everyone else’s business and neglect our own responsibilities, right?  I mean come on…who hasn’t said, “Did you see what she posted?” or “I can’t believe she did that!” or “Why doesn’t my life look like that?”  just to name a few…

Instead, by redeeming our phone time and putting healthy boundaries around not only the time we spend on our screens, but what we are looking at, we will buy back what time, energy, attention, focus, resources has been lost to the digital black hole of our devices- and instead invest in what God is about and what He is calling us to do. And interestingly, if you look at the context of 1 Thessalonians 4:11, it’s surrounded by the command to love one another MORE and MORE…

Is your phone-time REALLY helping you love God and others MORE?

You have to admit it has an effect…and probably not for the better.  That same friend who was sharing about her family, also shared about herself…that when she’s on her phone, it doesn’t make her feel good.  And she said that when she finally turns it off, it takes a while for her to “recover” from it’s effect.  

Why do we give so much time and attention to what only draws us away from what matters? 

I bet you were wondering if I would ever get to the 2nd key step for Christian women to overcome digital distraction…don’t worry, I have not forgotten. AWARENESS is the first step, and DECISION is the second.  Decide that enough is enough. Decide that you don’t want to be conformed by anything other than the Lord. Decide that you want His Truth to be what influences you. 

DECIDE that you want to make a change to REDEEM your time.  

Now, this process will look different for all of us because we are all in different places with our relationship to our phones right now-maybe you’re addicted, maybe you can walk away or maybe you’ve mostly unplugged already…no matter where you are, God is never done growing us into His likeness. And there is one thing we ALL have in common…changing our phone-time habits will be a challenge.  But, I promise, it will be worth it. 

Anything that helps us grow in self-discipline to live life WITH God is worth it, don’t you agree?

Left to ourselves we’ll default to what’s habitual, to what everyone else is doing, to what our flesh craves…but you are not alone. First, if you are His, you have HIS SPIRIT in you who can (and will) transform you (we’ll talk more about that soon).  And second, you have US- the REDEEM Her Time Community.  A group of women who have DECIDED to make the best use of our time in this season…and in light of eternity.  

Together, let’s NOT be so accessible to WHAT is calling on our devices, let’s be more available to WHO is calling in our hearts. 

We’re having deeper conversations about what this means and what to do about it over inside the REDEEM Her Time Community…so if you’re already a member, jump in and share your thoughts, questions or ideas and encourage the other ladies in the group…and be sure to grab your REDEEM Her Phone-Time Challenge Guide and free screensaver to help you be intentional during the challenge…and if you’re not a member yet, what are you waiting for?  It’s FREE!  Why don’t you make this your next step to redeeming your time by focusing on  that phone you carry around all day.  I’ll drop the link in the show notes for ya- it probably won’t be the first thing you clicked on today, but it may be the most important. 

Can’t wait to see what God does as we learn to use our phones well.  

Next time I’ll share some tips to start changing your phone habits and how to create your personalized plan, but before we go, let’s do a quick review and then I’ve got 3 questions for you to consider.  

The 2 key steps for Christian women to overcome digital distraction-

  1.  Be AWARE.
  2.  DECIDE to change.

And here are those reflection questions for you…I challenge you to really think or journal your answers and see what God might be saying to you…got a pen or at least your notes app ready?  I’ll give you a sec in case you’re multitasking…

  1.  What negative impacts has your phone had on your time, your relationships, your health…your spiritual life?  Be honest. 
  2.  Read Psalm 119: 9-10 and 15-16.  Does your attitude towards God’s Word match that of the Psalmist?  Why or why not?
  3. What do you want your phone-time habits to look like 40 days from now?  What difference would that make in your life?

I trust I’ve given you much to think and pray about…and we’ll be answering these questions together inside the community as we prepare for this challenge…I pray you’ll join us. In fact, may I pray for you now?

Dear Heavenly Father, 

As we begin this challenge to redeem our phone-time, may we see our devices with new eyes and hearts and learn how to use it well to love you and to love others more and more.  Help this listener to be more aware of how much her phone has an influence on her time, her thoughts, her relationships and her health.  May your Spirit lead her to deciding to lay down her patterns of using it and ask how it can be a tool for Your glory.  Thank you that she is not alone, your promised Spirit is within her to teach, remind and guide her in your ways. May she seek the truth in your word and treasure it more than her likes and notifications. And may You ultimately be the greatest influencer in her life. Thank you that you can change her to make her more like your Son.  In Jesus’s name we pray, Amen. 

Our challenge officially kicks off Feb 22nd, to cover the 40 days leading up to Easter, but there’s plenty to do to prepare our hearts and devices, so come join us and grab the resources you’ll need inside the REDEEM Her Time Community

Thanks for joining me for this episode and until next time, remember…

You DO have ALL the time you need to do ALL He has called you to.

Be available to who + what matters most in this season and in light of eternity…

Cuz you are here for Such a Time as This.  

Binge the REDEEM Her Phone-Time Challenge Series

Ep 105  No Time?  The #1 Tip to Find 1-4 Hours in your Day for Better Time Management

Visit the REDEEM Her Time Website at https://redeemhertime.com

> Join the REDEEM Her Time Community (did I mention it’s FREE?!)

> Get the REDEEM Her Phone-Time Guide + Screensaver (inside the group)

> Schedule a free 15 Min Strategy Session 

>>> or DO ALL-THE-ABOVE!

P.S.  And don’t forget to leave a review to get your name in the drawing for $100 OFF the REDEEM Her Time Program coming soon!!!

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